Let's make one thing perfectly clear: she is absolutely too young to be dying. Her boys (including her husband) deserve...no...need more time with her.
But dying she is.
After years of battling cancer, she has decided to stop the body-wrecking attempts to prolong her life. She is no longer focused on squeezing out an extra year or month of pain-filled existence, but is instead making a valiant effort to make her remaining days full of quality.
That's a huge bridge to cross, and she is doing it like she has done everything else in her life, with beauty and faith.
From her CaringBridge site:
I'm holding together relatively well. The hospice care team assigned to us is great keeping me as comfortable as possible. Medications are constantly needing to be looked at to keep my anxiety down and my breathing more fluid. I'm thankful for my special team of spiritual friends and guides who help me prepare for the Glory that awaits me. The balance there is difficult - wanting so much to be with Jesus and digging in my heels and wanting to stay here with my boys like I had planned all those years. But the word to notice there is I, not He. It is God's Will, not mine, that is the best ending to this and all stories. I will ask for your prayers to help me remember to continually ask for and accept His Will for me. It cannot be a bad ending if He is in charge. It has to be beautiful.
Truth is...I'm not sure I could write such a paragraph if I were in her condition. But another truth is that we are ALL in her condition. We are all, if Jesus continues to be patient with the world, on a trip to the grave. May we all make our own valiant efforts to fill each day with quality, beauty, and faith.
Dewey, thanks for the commentary. This hits so close to home as to be painful. The grace with which some are able to exit this life never fails to be amazing.
ReplyDeleteAnd the grace of those left behind is pretty inspiring, too, my brother.
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