It was the summer of 1994. I had spent the school year as a substitute teacher, having taken my family of six from a bad situation at the church I had been serving (as Youth & Worship Minister) back home to Northeast Indiana.
I was driving to the 4-season porch factory where I was working, listening to a tape of Rich Mullins' album, A Liturgy, a Legacy, and a Ragamuffin Band.
There I was, wondering if my best days were behind me...wondering if the great moments of spiritual victory and meaningful fellowship were forever in my past and never to be repeated...wondering if God would ever choose to use me in His Kingdom again. And then, in the song Hold Me, Jesus, Rich sang the words, "You have been King of my Glory; won't you be my Prince of Peace", and I had to pull off the road. I couldn't see where I was going because of my flowing tears.
Well, sometimes my life just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small
So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart
So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees
And this Salvation Army band is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin
So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
I'm singing hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace
Words & Music by Rich Mullins
c.1993 Edward Grant, Inc. (ASCAP)
Truth is...I've had more than one moment in my life when God's closeness and provision and wise direction all seemed to be in the rear-view mirror...and He has always...always...provided peace and provision in the present, and a powerful reminder of His love for me that will never end.
Thanks for the good post and reassuring reminder, Dewey.
ReplyDelete